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Roger’s life changing lesson in Thailand

By R.G. Ramsey

Roger's lesson in Thailand

“If plan A doesn't work, the alphabet has 25 more letters - 204 if you're in Japan.” ~Claire Cook

Life can be a cruel teacher.

Roger standing strong, tall, and resolute as an alpha male should reached out his trembling hand to grasp the hand of his former lover Som Jai.

Som Jai was from Thailand, she told the love-struck Roger the first time they met her name meant to be content with what you have in life.

Roger was smitten by Som Jai from the first moment that he saw her beautiful black eyes staring back at him. He knew from the start that she was the one that he wanted to spend the rest of his life with.

Som Jai was beautiful in his eyes. Her long black hair hung down to the small of her back. Her petite, toned body, the result of daily aerobics made Roger’s heart skip a beat every time he looked upon her.

Roger, a frequent traveler to Thailand, lived a happy existence in America with dreams of finding the perfect woman to spend the rest of his life with.



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Som Jai had two children from a previous relationship. Roger didn’t mind her having children and thought he was ready for a pre-made family.

The two-bedroom house that she rented looked more like a storage unit in Roger’s eyes. Som Jai shared one bedroom with her daughter, and her son slept in the other bedroom.

Roger offered to rent a three-bedroom home in the city she lived in so her children could have separate bedrooms. She loved to cook healthy foods therefore the home would have to have a full kitchen so Som Jai could prepare delicious, healthy meals for the whole family.

Roger was so in love with Som Jai he gave up everything he had in America to start a new life in Thailand. Everything was going to be great, and he was going to spend the rest of his life with this lovely Thai lady.

Things quickly changed when Roger got to Thailand and met Som Jai and her mother at the airport.

Som Jai had an older motorbike and thought Roger should prove he loved her by buying her a new motorbike. Roger told her to wait until after the marriage, then they can pick one out together.

She took Roger around on her motorbike looking at houses that were for rent before showing him houses that were for sale as well. There was one house that she liked the most. It was a two-story house that sat on a small plot of land.

It had three bedrooms, a nice kitchen area, and a comfortable family room that would be great for relaxing, or for her parents to sleep when they came to visit. She told Roger she could cook some healthy meals for him, and take good care of him there.

“Please buy this house for us.” she said.

“I cannot buy a house in Thailand because I am a foreigner.” Roger replied.

“You can buy it in my name, and then we can live there together forever.” She said.

“How about we rent a house first, then we can look for the perfect house for us.” He said.

“That is stupid.” She replied, “Why rent a house when you can buy?”

Roger knew that this was a popular scam in Thailand. Foreign man buys a house in the name of a Thai lady, Thai lady kicks him out and moves in her whole family. The foreign man comes back to the house, Thai lady calls the police and has him arrested for trespassing because the house is in her name.

Roger was too smart for this. He held Som Jai’s hand, looked her in the eye, and said, “We will rent a house together first, that will give us a whole year to find the perfect house for us to buy. Okay…?”

Som Jai responded with fire in her eyes, “If you want me to marry you, you must buy a house in my name first. If you don’t buy for me it means you not love me.”

“I do love you. I gave up everything in America to live with you in Thailand.” he said, “The best I can offer you now is to rent a three-bedroom house. I will pay all of the rent, you help with utilities and food.”

Som Jai was unimpressed by the life that Rodger had offered her and opted for a slightly more desirable life in Japan.

She had a friend who lived in Japan and told her she could get her a job there. The lovely Som Jai was not content to share her short time here on earth with the likes of Roger and decided on plan B without hesitation. Som Jai did not live up to her name.

Roger beat himself up for a long time over this and wondered why this outcome happened to him.

He often wondered what would have happened if he had bought a house in Som Jai’s name.

He had heard through her friends that Som Jai found a new boyfriend in Japan and he took good care of her.


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After 18 months she decided to come back to Thailand. Roger found out she would be back in Thailand, and eagerly awaited her return.

“How have you been?” Roger asked Som Jai greeting her two days after her return to Thailand and grasping her hand firmly.

“How was Japan?”

“I enjoyed living there. I found work cooking in a restaurant, and cutting hair in a salon.” Som Jai replied.

Roger sheepishly said, “What about your new boyfriend in Japan? “

“Him not take good care of me.” Som Jai said in her still broken English.

“Remember I tell you before, I need a man who can take care me, and give me money so when I am old woman I can live comfortably.”

“Yes, I remember.” Roger said.

“Him not give me money every week, so I must leave him.” She said, “Him tell me, I buy this for you, I buy that for you, why I give you more money too?”

“I told him, you say like my ex-husband. Him tell me same same you, then him beat me up.” She said, “I not want man to abuse me again that’s why I work out and stay healthy every day. Do you understand?”

Roger finally understood as he remembered the first conversation he had with her mother.

Som Jai’s mother asked him, “Do you love my daughter?”

“Yes, I love her.”

“Do you want to marry her?”

“Yes I do, I promise I will take good care of her.” Roger said.

“Why? She is crazy girl!” her mother replied with a confused look on her face.

Roger could now see the big picture looking back in hindsight.

Roger didn’t lose Som Jai, he dodged a bullet, and learned a valuable lesson.


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